August 28: EXPO

iMPACT high school youth ministry is in full gear! For those of you new to the blog, I am a part-time youth ministry assistant. Yes, this crazy mom works with high schoolers…and I LOVE them! In fact, we are in the market for a high schooler if you are interested in loaning/renting one out to us!

I am really proud of the expo. It was our first year doing it and we had 75 students and their parents there to showcase all our ministry opportunities and introduce them to our volunteer staff. It took a lot of hard work and planning, but I think we pulled it off.

I will be honest. To say I have been stretched too thin is an understatement. Not at my job-my emotions. Last year, we had about 4 events for Build with the Boyces and I remember commenting about the emotional stress it had on me the few days after. I don’t know how to explain it, but being the center of attention-being the charity case-being the one in the spotlight, smiling, being strong, explaining Sanfilippo as Jayden twists and turns around me as I smile and try to pay attention to what someone is telling me….I am just drained. This summer has not allowed me time to recoup from one event before the next one starts. And, I feel guilty for even having emotions because everyone is so generous and has worked so hard….I am thankful and want to be there! But-I have been on TURBO speed this summer and realized it when I had my first chance to breathe after the EXPO.

It didn’t help that I was coming into the EXPO with the weight of the summer on me. But I am sensitive. Funny how out of 30 compliments, the 2 negative ones carry the most weight. I can’t spell, that is obvious by my blogs. And instead of these 2 people noticing the thousands of words I spelled correct, or the 20+ hours I invested into the event, or the overall success of the event…they point out a misspelled word. To further the blow, one even commented on how the parents were all making fun of it. I know, let it roll….but I didn’t. It was the infamous straw that broke my back. I left broken and in tears. I cried myself home and had some Jayden therapy (held him sleeping for 45 min) as I cried into his little shirt. I know pathetic. But, it helped.

I realized something convicting. I am no better than those 2 people. Critical and negative. Waiting to fix, correct, point out, any and every “wrong” I notice. Why? Why do I do that? Why can’t I show a little grace? See the 100 good things instead of the one bad thing? I woke up the next morning and apologized to Jut because he get the brunt of it. Lesson learned.